Here you are again, chumped by a smooth-talking, fast-walking flim flam man. You believed all his promises, although there was no way for him to deliver any of them. How much better off you would be with a mute, who would be unable to sing his own praises and be reduced to being judged by his actions alone. But you do not have to listen to a man’s words to know who he is in his heart. He is telling you every minute who he is, by his actions. He cannot help but do this. We all come down to our actions after all.

By their fruits you shall know them

Matthew, 7:16

If you never want to be taken in again by another flim flam man, remember:

•     Stop your ears to his words. The next time someone is spinning a golden tale of himself, ask yourself, in whose interest is he speaking? Stop your ears to his pleas, entreaties, braggadocio, threats, promises, all other blather, all words.

 

•     Close your eyes to all appearances. If he wears nicer clothes, lives in a nicer house, in a nicer neighborhood, with better people, and in any other way seems higher than you, reject this temptation on your part to assume an inferior position. No, this cannot be. If it is your habit to be seduced by any appearances, close your physical eyes to such baubles, and  teach your spiritual eyes to open and become aware.

• Pay attention to results. It is not about what they say it is. Flim flam men are always good talkers. But they leave behind them a trail of broken relationships and unfulfilled promises. They promise more than they deliver.

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Every flim flam man is the same as every other. Ignore any claims of specialness. You must close your eyes to his flim flamming appearances, and your ears to his flim flam talk.  Look instead at his actions, especially when he is unguarded, when he least expects to be observed. Look at his history, because how he has always been is the best predictor of how he will be in future.

And ask yourself: where is his heart? what does he do with time? what does he love?

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness

Galatians 5:22

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It is easy, girlfriend.